Amber Heard sobbed in court when she said she filed for divorce from Johnny Depp because she feared she “wouldn’t survive” if she stayed in the relationship.
“I knew if I didn’t, I probably wouldn’t literally survive,” she said, fighting back tears.
Ms Heard told the jury in the multimillion-dollar libel trial on Monday that her decision to divorce her then-husband was “the hardest thing I ever had to do”.
But she said she realized she had to because the “freak” and domestic violence had become the “normal.”
“The monster had been this thing that was now normal and not the exception. Violence was now normal and not the exception,” she sobbed.
“I think it would have taken it too far and I wouldn’t be here.”
Ms. Heard returned to the stand for a third day of testimony as the trial resumed in Fairfax, Virginia, after a week-long recess on Monday.
Depp sues his ex-wife for defamation over a 2018 op-ed she wrote washington post where she described herself as “a public figure representing domestic abuse.”
The pirates of the Caribbean The actor is not named in the article, which is titled “I have spoken out against sexual violence and faced the wrath of our culture. That has to change.”
However, Depp claims that it falsely implies that he is a domestic abuser, something he adamantly denies, and has left him struggling to land roles in Hollywood. He is suing for $50 million.
Ms Heard is countersuing for $100 million, accusing Mr Depp of orchestrating a “smear campaign” against her and describing his lawsuit as a continuation of “abuse and harassment”.
On Monday, Ms Heard testified about her decision to finally file for divorce from Mr Depp.
“At the time I felt like it was the hardest thing I had ever had to do,” he said.
“I had worked very hard to try to make this relationship work.
“I went to therapy. I went to Al‑Anon. I got help. I read books. I did everything I could think of and it didn’t work.”
The Aquaman actress said she was “conflicted” about filing for divorce because she loved Depp “so much” but said she knew she had to after a violent incident in which she allegedly threw a phone in his face.
“I was conflicted. I knew after he threw the phone in my face that after all that month of not seeing each other, not getting better, not being clean and sober, everything was falling apart,” she said.
“It was very difficult. I knew I had to leave him. I knew I wouldn’t survive if I didn’t. So I made the decision to file for divorce.
“It was difficult because I loved Johnny very much. She loved him so much.”
Ms. Heard’s eyes filled with tears as she told the court that she feared for her life.
“I was so afraid that it was going to end very badly for me,” he said.
“And I really didn’t want to leave it.”
Ms Heard sobbed as she said taking the step to file for divorce was “very difficult” but said she “knew I had to do it”.
She told the jury that she filed for a domestic violence restraining order because she wanted to “feel safe.”
Ms Heard spoke about the toll the relationship had taken on her, saying it was “falling apart”.
She said that security would always let Mr. Depp into her house no matter how much he begged them not to.
“I wanted to change my locks. I wanted a good night’s sleep,” she sobbed.
“I was losing hair, I was losing weight… I couldn’t sleep… I was having panic attacks all the time. I was falling apart,” she said.
“I was scared and conflicted because the person I was afraid of was also the person I was in love with.”
Ms Heard had previously told the court about an alleged incident on May 21, 2016 in which she said he threw a cell phone in her face.
Police were called over the incident, but Ms Heard said she did not cooperate with them because she “didn’t want him to get into trouble”.
“I didn’t want the world to know,” he said.
The jury was shown a photo of his bruised face which he said was caused by the phone.
Mr. Depp denies abusing his ex-wife and testified that he had already told Ms. Heard that he planned to divorce her when she filed for divorce.
He said he had gone to the apartment to collect some belongings and that Ms Heard was having a laugh on the phone with a friend about an incident where faeces had been left on his bed.
She said she picked up the phone and told her friend, “You can have her now. She is all yours.
Depp claimed that he then “dropped the phone on the couch”.